Welcome to our new series of guest Q&As with divorce experts! As mediators, we work with many talented professionals from various disciplines, who all have a stake in our clients’ well-being, during and after divorce. Often, to help them move forward, our clients will want to work with a life coach specializing in divorce.
Meet Natasha Edwina, M.A., M.S., a former marriage and family therapist turned mind-body health consultant and certified mindful coach. She specializes in self-love/self-care, relationships, mind-body medicine, and the integration of spirituality and sexuality. She brings 25+ years of experience working with relationship system, and has helped many of our clients and their families transcend trauma and stress.
We asked Natasha a few questions to shed light on the tension that surrounds newly divorced families, and her guidance is enlightening! Read on to learn more about her career as a life coach specializing in divorce.
What advice would you give to families going through their first holiday season post-divorce?
N.E.: The holidays can be a very stressful time. There is an expectation of cheer, and togetherness, and if that is not what life is serving up, one can feel left out and/or as if they are doing something wrong.
Additionally, the holidays bring up extra expenses during a time when more money is temporarily going out to professionals to get through the crisis and one household is being divided into two. My divorce began just before the holidays and it was a very difficult time.
Family and cultural traditions are protective against trauma. For the sake of the children, and your inner child, try to maintain similar rituals and foods during the holidays as much as possible. If it’s not possible to be peaceful enough to continue to spend the holidays together, get together with your family of origin. If you will now be spending the holidays as a single parent, you can bring in traditions from your ancestors. Then, if you’d like to go deeper, you can thank your ancestors for all they’ve navigated to get you here. You can let them know you are honoring them by breaking dysfunctional cycles that have run through the generations and they were either powerless or unaware of breaking.
Divorce can be traumatic, but it doesn’t have to be. There are ways to navigate through to healthier family relationships, and a better model of romantic relationship for your children, even if that is staying single and showing them you have healthy boundaries and will not tolerate mistreatment or non-reciprocal relationships.
?What type of client do you see? Or, who is your ideal client
N.E.: I tend to work with busy professionals with high intensity lives or others that are looking for work/life balance, joy, passion, or creating career success alongside relationship or family success… not sacrificing one for the other.
What piece of advice would you offer to a couple going through a divorce?
N.E.: It can be very, very easy to have unconscious, knee-jerk reactions to under stress. When we are under stress we default to our subconscious reactions – in other words, those behaviors our caretakers used… for better or for worse. But this divorce crisis is also an opportunity to break a cycle and change the trajectory of your family legacy toward greater health and harmony. Practice mindfulness, be the observer of what is happening while also protecting yourself, your children, and your financial wellbeing.
Aggression is never the answer. If you are struggling with being assertive and calm, and swinging to either aggressive (putting the anxiety on someone else) or passive (holding all the anxiety yourself) please work with a professional therapist or coach to help guide your family through.
This is also an opportunity to rediscover yourself. Enjoy the process of discovering what lights you up. It will be your fuel, and very necessary during this transition.
Can you tell us an interesting fact about you or your business?
N.E.: I have degrees in both relationship science and health science, and find that the intersection of these two areas is the key to creating truly healthy, thriving relationships and emotional health. I’ve worked with clients virtually long before the pandemic, with people all over the world, though I also enjoy doing sessions and events in person locally.
After 25 years of experience healing minds, bodies, and relationships, I have created an innovative, unique, signature package thats heals on the conscious, subconscious, somatic, and relational level simultaneously. This mind-body consulting package has created deep sustainable change in just two months, saving people time and money. My thousands of clients have celebrated success quite quickly, which delights us both.
Natasha is not an employee of our divorce mediation firm, but rather a trusted partner in the community. To learn more about her coaching practices, visit NatashaEdwina.com.
Looking for support for your divorce? San Diego Family Mediation Center serves families across California by facilitating divorce outside of the courtroom, acting as a neutral third party to help both parties resolve conflict and move forward. We can also refer you to other trusted practitioners, such as a life coach specializing in divorce. Contact us for a free and confidential consultation.
